Monday, January 30, 2012

Marriage: Truths or Fairytales. What Do You Believe?

I found this poem, actually it was a video of him speaking the poem, this morning that I wanted to share with you.  It is written by Jeffrey Bethke and speaks the TRUTH about sex and marriage and the lies that we've believed and our children now believe as evidence in society.  As I read this poem I even thought about my own marriage and how I still expect some form of a fairytale marriage.  I am blessed to have such a wonderful Godly man who truly loves me, and in many ways he has been the handsome prince that rescued this Cinderella, of which I am so grateful.  We are great friends and love just being in the same room with each other, no matter what we are doing.  Yet, I still find myself dreaming of things and how I would like them to happen.  He has told me that it's as if he doesn't do these things the way that I want, then I feel like he doesn't love me.  Wow!  What a revelation.  Exposed that deception.  Am I still believing a lie?  Is that honoring him?  Has the media so influenced us to the core that we believe in or dream of living a fairytale?   Something to think about.

Sex, Marriage, & Fairytales
by Jeffrey Bethke

Disney movies and chick flicks, they've put us in a weird position,
They've distorted our reality, cause we forget they are actually fiction,
Because in marriage we either get better or bitter, either joy or remorses,
What we're doing isn't working, just look at the rate of divorces
 So how's your marriage?  I mean c'mon let's be honest,
Marriage to some seems more like a prison, than the paradise they were promised
We thought marriage was supposed to fulfill us and make us happy, not lonely
But the truth is God's first priority is making us Holy.

You say, "no one told me," and, "it feels odd
that dating felt like a vacation, while marriage feels like a job"
Yet the secret of joy, if we just pull back the facade,
Is realizing most problems arise when we elevate our spouse to God
Without knowing it we've fulfilled Romans 1:25
By our actions, exchanged the Truth about God for a lie,
We've exchanged God for lesser, created things,
It's like a husband trading his wife for a 2D image on a screen,
Hoping it'll set us free, just to find on the fumes we're choking
Cause if your marriage rests on anything but JESUS, it's resting on something BROKEN
Yet guys continually sacrifice their marriage on the altar of sex and lust,
I mean if our dollars were honest, they'd say "in PLEASURE we TRUST"
So men GROW UP, put down the controller,
How about you lead her with GRACE, instead of trying to control her.

Now I've never been married, but I'm a product of one that was non-existent,
So don't tell me I don't understand the pain, don't tell me I don't get it
So for singles, become friends first before you ever become lovers,
Pursue Jesus as your foundation, before you get under the covers
Because believe me a strong friendship before marriage, will make a good marriage after,
Marriage isn't just sex, it's deep conversation and laughter.
I mean some spouses barely even like each other, and the marriage seems like a dead end.
You might share a checkbook and a house, but are you actually friends?
I mean if marriage isn't a commitment, then what's the point of the vows we say?
"Til death do us part", really means until the feelings go away.
Like, "I'll stay with him, but only until it gets tough and my love shifts",
But I say imagine if a parent took that perspective with her kids,
Like can't you see it, the minute the kid spills food on the floor,
The mom saying, "Forget it, I don't love you anymore!"
No its just like marriage, to last you need the strength from above,
Because it's not the love that sustains the promise, it's the promise that sustains the love.

I mean think about it, out of anyone who has the right to leave?
God had every reason in the world, yet He still came for you and me,
And on the cross He paid it all, He took our shame and set us free,
When He could've called down legions of angels, He chose to stay on that tree.
From the cross He looks you in the eye, and says I'm taking this for My Bride,
When you trust in Me, you no longer have to hide!
Because of Me it is finished, you have been made new!
You're SPOTLESS, you're BLAMELESS there's no sin in you!

His death was a proposal, He wanted you no matter the cost,
Where some guys propose on a knee, Jesus proposed on a cross.
So read Ephesians 5, whether husband or wife,
Wife honor your husband, husbands give up your life,
Just like Jesus gave Himself for His Bride, the church
So men lead by serving, by putting her first
So die to self, put your flesh on a life sentence,
Because you don't fall out of love, you fall out of REPENTANCE.

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